“I am a fan of the social policies that you find in Europe.” – Hillary to Rep. Dennis Hastert in 1993
“We just can’t trust the American people to make these types of choices…. Government has to make those choices for people.” – Hillary to a friend before starting law school
“We are at a stage in [...]
Senator Hillary Clinton, on an airliner bound for Texas, finds herself seated next to an older, weathered man in a western snap shirt, faded jeans, and a cowboy hat. Thinking herself above the old cowboy, she decides to make sport of him.
‘You know,’ she says, ‘I’ve heard these flights go much more quickly if you [...]
Women get bra price equality
Forty years after feminists threatened to burn their bras, British women have won another battle in the fight for equality.
Asda, Britain’s second-biggest food retailer and owned by U.S. giant Wal-Mart, says it will no longer charge women more for bigger bras in its George fashion range.
“We’re putting an end once and [...]
A British bus company has apologized to a girl who is led around on a leash by her boyfriend and describes herself as a human pet after one of its drivers threw her off a bus.
Tasha Maltby, 19, told British newspapers she was the “pet” of her 25-year-old fiance Dani Graves.
Pictures showed her dressed in [...]
MADRID – A Spanish driver who collided with a cyclist is suing the dead youth’s family $29,300 for the damage the impact of his body did to his luxury car, a Spanish newspaper reported on Friday.
Businessman Tomas Delgado says 17-year-old Enaitz Iriondo caused $20,500 of damage to his Audi A8 in the fatal 2004 crash [...]
Miss the experience of skiing? Try the following to get that feeling back.
10. Visit your local butcher and pay $10 to sit in his walk-in freezer for half an hour. Afterwards, burn two $50 dollar bills to warm up.
9. Go to the nearest hockey rink and walk across the ice 20 times in your ski [...]
A man owned a small farm in Indiana. The Indiana State Wage & Hour Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an Agent out to interview him. “I need a list of your employees and how much You pay them,” demanded the agent.
“Well,” replied the farmer, “there’s my farm [...]
One Sunday morning, everyone in a bright, beautiful, tiny town got up early and went to the local church. Before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking about their lives, their families, etc.
Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, [...]
A small town doctor was famous in the area for always catching large fish.
One day while he was on one of his frequent fishing trips he got a call that a woman at a neighboring farm was giving birth. He rushed to her aid and delivered a healthy baby boy.
The farmer had nothing to weigh [...]
Americans have raised a fast-talkin’, glib, lecherous, plagiarist coon to the status of George Washington. And that’s beyond madness, boys & girls, it’s utter folly!
If a group of white chauvinists decided to recast the saint’s day of a universally revered saint as an occasion on which to stage a parade to celebrate the white race; [...]
Really Good Hints for the Inexperienced Traveler
- Be very suspicious if the advertised price of a Caribbean cruise includes the phrase “Free Ammo.”
- Consider carefully before visiting a country where the license plate motto is Die American Pig.
- There is no legitimate reason for a travel agent to need to know if you have experience [...]
A young schoolboy was having a hard time pronouncing the letter ”R,” and all the other kids were, of course, teasing him about it.
To help him out, the teacher gave him a sentence to practice at home: ”Robert gave Richard a rap in the ribs for roasting the rabbit so rare.” In class a few [...]
On duty as a customer-service rep for a car-rental company, I took a call from a driver who needed a tow. He was stranded on a busy highway, but he didn’t know the make of the car he was driving.
I asked again for a more detailed description beyond “a blue four-door.”
After a pause, the driver [...]
A minister delivered a sermon in ten minutes one Sunday morning. That was about half the usual length of his sermons.
He explained, “I regret to inform you that my dog, who is very fond of eating paper, ate that portion of my sermon which I was unable to deliver this morning.”
After the service, a visitor [...]
Sometimes it’s hard to see the back of the fridge.
A Civil War soldier, who had lost his bayonet, whittled one from wood so that he could pass inspection. He hoped he would not be discovered until the regiment had gone into battle, where he planned to pick one up from a dead soldier.
At inspection, an officer asked to see his bayonet. The soldier stated, [...]
JACK (age 3) was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister. After a while he asked: “Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold milk?”
MELANIE (age 5) asked her Granny how old she was. Granny replied she was so old she didn’t remember any more. Melanie said, “If [...]
Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.
The Personnel Manager said, “Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, Except one. Unless you pass it you cannot qualify for this job.”
Mujibar said, “I am ready.”
The manager said, “Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green.”
Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, “Mister [...]
When a customer slid into the barber chair, the barber asked him how he wanted his hair cut.
“Make it short,” the customer replied, “with a bare patch above my left ear, but longer on the right side so that it covers my right ear. I also want my left sideburn above my left ear and [...]
I’d had a pretty hectic day with my four-year-old. When bed-time finally came, I laid down the law: “We’re putting on your p.j.s, brushing your teeth, and reading ONE book. Then it’s lights out!”
Her arms went around my neck in a gentle embrace, and she said, “We learned in Sabbath school about little boys and [...]
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Bob the computer guy, to come over. Bob clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum service call.
As he was walking away, I called after him, “So, what was wrong?” He replied, “It was an ID [...]